New Swiss Army Knife

Today it was offically announced that there will be a new Swiss Army Knife. It will include all the origanal features and many new abilities. One of the new feautures is that the Knife will have a small lightsaber on it around about 4 inches long. The tiny lightsaber was inspired from the Star Wars movies, George Lucas has already been paid royalties for his idea. The lightsaber is powered using a tiny generator that draws its power from the people's around it who hate George Bush, their hate fuels it.

Another feature of the New and Improved Swiss Army Knife is that it contains a mini pistol, flamethrower, trip wire, oil slick, transforming abilities, cell phone, ipod and you can order fries with it.

Many countries have already placed orders for it. The Knife is expected to be International in 2 weeks. Australia, America, France, Germany, Russia and Great Britian were the first countries to place orders in huge amounts. Many hail the Knife as a gift from God himself.

In 2 weeks time you all could have your hands on the New Swiss Army Knife, its getting ever closer.