The Truth About Lupus

Lupus is a disease though you could hardly count is as one becuase it is never Lupus. Wikipeida defines Lupus as "Lupus is a chronic inflammatory disease that occurs when the body's immune system attacks its own tissue and organs." There have only ever been a few documented case of Lupus in History so we move for Lupus to hence after not be known as a disease. One of the people helping support us and is the model on the poster is Actor Hugh Laurie who plays Doctor Gregory House in the tv show House M.D.

We want a Convention held in Geneva to make this an International agreement so that at last people will stop suggesting that its Lupus because...

IT'S NEVER LUPUS!!!

The World in American Eyes

The American government has realsed the new wolrd map to be used in all U.S class rooms from this point on. The Map has already created a lot of negitive publicity for the American Government. The reason for a change is still a Government Secert.

The map has caused an International debate about if the Americans have been racially insinsitve or if they are just telling the truth. I guess we will soon find out but alteast America is trying to teach the children about the enitre world.

Harry Potter Condoms

New Harry Potter Merchindise is now available at all retailers. You are now able to buy Harry Potter condoms. They are guarented never to break due to there magic material and they are also invisible due to the invisibility charm placed upon them. Harry Potter himself endorsess them and even quoted their slogan and the grand unveiling.

The slogan for the condoms is the following"Protect your wand from"wand" from "Hogwarts" when entering her"Chamber of Secrets"".

We also support the new condoms and advise you all to buy a box if you have any children that like Harry Potter, they will love it.

Brock Obama Picks His Cabinet

United States of America's President Brock Obama has today announced his Presidential Cabinet and they are as follows:
Secretary of State: Misty
Secretary of Treasury: Psyduck
Secretary of Defence: Mewtwo
Attorney General: Charmander
Secretary of Interior: Ash
Secretary of Agriculture: Bulbasaur
Secretary of Commerce: Gary Oak
Secretary of Labour: Onix
Secretary of Health and Human Services: Mew
Secretary of Housing and Urban Development: Squirtle
Secretary of Transportation: Abra
Secretary of Energy: Pikachu
Secretary of Education: Professor Oak
Secretary of Veterans' Affairs: Kabutto
Secretary of Homeland Security: Deoxys

Dogs Playing Poker & Pool Must Be Stopped

Dogs playing poker and pool has been going on for a few years now but it has reached the point were it can no longer be tolerated so the Australian government has decided to kill any Dog caught doing either. The new policy is considerd by many to be a bit of an over reaction, but no one has big enough balls to go against the Australian government no matter how weak they are. It is well known that Kevin Rudd (a.k.a Big K) is afraid of Dogs and is trying get rid of them to hide that fact.

Although Rudd is afraid of Dogs it was actuelly Barack Obama's idea for the policy and Kevin Rudd while on his knees infront of Obama is noted to have said "mmh" when asked the question. It would seem that Australia is know at war with every single Dog in Australia. If the War is succseful then Brock Obama will start a war with the Dogs in America(and we don't mean the ugly girls).

We Advise All Dogs To Go Into Hiding

The Truth of Phone Sex

A shocking Study has been realesed today documenting what Phone Sex is like for a Phone. It turns out that a Phone goes through tremedous stress and anxiety during Phone Sex. The amount of stress that they go through ruins their lives and yet people don't give the Phone a second thought.

Many Phones have also been rapped and never been the same again, while these Phones are usually replaced at their jobs they then end up in councilling for the rest of their life, because of people who participate in Phone Sex. It is because of this that a orginization has been set up to help Phones recover from Phone Sex.

Barack Obama Steps Down

Today the United States of America's President Barack Obama has resigned. It has been revealed that his brother Brock Obama will be sworn in on the 27th of November. The American Public is shocked by Barack Obama's notice but they seem to have confidence in his brother to keep the country afloat.

We all wish President Electe Brock Obama well with his new position in government, and also to all the women who shall be servicing the new President

Dumbledore, Comes Out His Magical Closet

Today Albus Dumbledore the esteemed Headmaster of Hogwarts admit he was gay. The public is shocked by this sudden announcment. The wizard community are equally as shocked as we are.

There is still no news on how Harry Potter is taking this news. While many may question the unhealthy realationship that Harry and Dumbledore share, we belive it is healthy for an old gay man to be spending a lot of time with a young boy. Though its has been reaveled that Dumbledore's partner is none other than Gandalf.

Voldemort today also spoke publicly after Dumbledore's announcement saying he knew Dumbledore was gay. When Voldemort was at school Dumbledore tried to hook up with him. It seems everyones favourite wizard is nothing more than a gay pedofile.

Hiatis

We have recently been on a hiatis has been caused by some rather unkind Governtment Officials who have been looking for us. We avoided them by hiding in a Dutch mans attic. There were several other people in there with us. One little girl stood out above the rest, her name was Anna Frank. Anna and her family were hidimg from the Nazi's but i am sorry to say were found. Our wishes go with Anna and her family.

The Public Infortmation Act is now back.